it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
