Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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