Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Randomize