I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
