ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
