ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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