Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
MIDGETS
????
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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