i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
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