You're so nebulous sometimes
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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