Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
