Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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