This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
She needs sedatives and a leash
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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