remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
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