Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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