lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Two words: blizzard sex
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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