Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
