I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
