My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
