I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Alive.
So much puke
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
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