they need to just BURY HIM!
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
