we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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