Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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