you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
