She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Even my vagina gasped.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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