I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Of course I have a pirate flag
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
