Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
