at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Randomize
