I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
