Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
