I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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