Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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