Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
You're so nebulous sometimes
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Damn victory sex feels great
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
