And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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