all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
