how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
