shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
