Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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