whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize