So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
