i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
