yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
