It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
