just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
