what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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