Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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