I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
