Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
