So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
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