is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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