Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
